Penny for your thought.

With the recently found knowledge that Bert reads fanfiction, what do you think he read(s) ?

Maybe The Dominant ? You know Rob wants to go Dombert on someone's ass and I will gladly be his sub. 

Or perhaps he reads Wide Awake. Who doesn't love a Darkward ?

Or maybe he does the five knuckle shuffle to The Office, a new favorite of mine. He can live out his sexy secretary fantasy with that one.

Personally, I hope he reads Scotch, Gin, and the New Girl. Rich, young, beautiful, arrogant, son of a bafta Edward is a favorite of mine.

What does everyone else think ?

*Packs bowl*

Lets get blazed with Kristen and look at Bert's GQ Spread...

GQ scans:

*Lights bowl and takes hit*

*chokes on smoke* Unnfffff

SmokeBERT.

*tries to read*

*passes bowl*

sexBert.

Panties...............................................dropped.

*tries to read but thinking dirrrrty thoughts about almostlayingonbackBERT*

Is Bert eye fucking me?

*takes another hit*

credit:

http://www.robertpattinsononline.com/

Christmas in March

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Bafta, wtf is that?

So, you're reading our kick ass blog and come across a word, and think "what the fuck is that?"
Have no fear. I have compiled a mini dictionary of sorts to help you understand what we are saying.

• bafta (no, not the British award thing) - a swear word, such as bitch, cunt, fuck, etc.....
• truth - our way of saying "yes, i agree with that."
  
• ___bert - however Bert (Rob) is looking at the time. If he looks like a dork (dorkbert), looks like sex (sexbert), looks like a hobo (hobobert), or is wearing his Doc Martens (docbert). We love all ___berts.
  
• OMB (ohmybert) - oh my god; omg.
  
• hot tranny mess - someone that looks a hot mess and like a tranny. Mainly used for Nikki Reed, even though we love her.
  
• Oregano - Michael Angarano, KStew's boyfriend.
  
• Tombert or Robstu - The ultimate bromance that is Robert Pattinson and Tom Sturridge.
  
• The plaid shirt - the plaid shirt of love that Tombert share together.
  
• Rpattzed - our version of a Rick Roll. And yes, we will do it to you.
  
• Daddy C - Carlisle Cullen, or Peter Facinelli.
  
• robhab - where we all need to go for rehabilitation of being robsessed.
• robsessed - being completely and utterly obsessed with Rob Pattinson.
  
• asshat - asshole; someone with their head up their ass
• dickbag - douchebag; a bag of douche
• douche nozzle - asshole, dummy, bitch, reject, etc....
• accent fuck -talking to a dude that has an accent (for example he has an accent he spoke to me hence I was accent fucked) or the act of having sex with someone that has an accent
• (getting) kstewed - getting high as a kite.

This is a growing dictionary. Words will be added as we use them.

Proof that Bert indeed..

... fucked Joe Jonas. This was the day Joe had to stop wearing that purity ring.

Don't you guys think Joe should def stop wearing so much makeup???

Loves it...

A drunk Bert is the best Bert...

Bad Moon Set Pictures

Our boy Bert doing what make our panties wet.

(FemmeFatale Note: The Twilight cast has got me smoking again)

Nikki & Taylor Before
Nikki & Taylor After with KStew

Jackson's hair sure grew up fast, didn't it?

Ashley really looks like a vamp now.
Kellan doing our favorite thing in a guy.
Daddy C knows how to make us pant.

To see more on set pics click here.

We knew that purity ring was BS.

Is there anything you wish you’d gotten to talk about in this interview?

“Okay,” he says. Deep breath. “I fucked Joe Jonas.”

We knew it!

“I love him.”


To read the rest of the GQ Interview go here.

April GQ HQ Pics Bitches

MutherfuckinsmokinhotBert:

Link: justjared.buzznet.com

FML *updated*

GQBert has surfaced...can I get a collective *dies* from everyone?

Jizz